Avatar: RACIST PLOT!??!

In a word, no. But now that we have your attention, there’s been quite a large earthquake in Haiti. We’re quite frankly a little offended that you would even take the time to read an article about this ridiculous assertion regarding the latest wham-bam James Cameron epic.

If there is a racist plot, then it would be You, Joe and Josephine Reader, sitting there and reading this article, while meanwhile scores of articles describing the plight of the Haitian people sit mere inches away. Unread.
Please, help the Haitian people. Read the articles. Maybe even give some money.

Did you see last night’s Idol? Of course you did. I wonder who will win!? That one guy with the dyed black hair, am I right? Can you say “totally hot straight Adam Lambert”?

Can you also say “unspeakable tragedy in Haiti”? That’s what people who care about the world are saying.
No, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to strong-arm you. That was harsh. Come back. Really. Come back. Trust me, like the Na’avi trusted their white savior, Jake Sully. Maybe it was a racist plot after all. Yes, maybe James Cameron’s latest whiz-bang action spectacle is racist after all.

Or maybe not. But do you realize how easy it is to give money to Haiti!? You can text it, for Chrissakes, (or, for Sullysakes, if that what it takes for you to listen.) Even George Strombolopoulus is in on this, and he seems like a real dick.

It’s a sad comment on the state of society if we need to distract you with buzz words like Blu Rays, and Jay Leno, and The Situation. It’s sad that you’re all trudging out in the winter to go see a 3 dimensional James Cameron whigamaroo action experience, rather than donating money to Haiti. All three dimensions in Haiti are messed up right now. People are losing their Avatars, and their houses.

See, the Earth was trying to steal unobtainium from the Haitian people. In this case, “unobtanium” means “homes,” “family,” and “food.” You have the chance to be Jake Sully in this scenario. Give money to Haiti. Please.
Seriously, we’ll even let you keep the glasses.

To Give Money to Haiti, Click Here

To Purchase Tickets to the next Avatar Screening in Your City, Click Here

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